If You are Gay (and even if you’re not)

My princes,

It is 2014 right now, and your mom is angry.  You know, the kind of angry where you can almost feel it in your fingertips? Well for relief, I feel the need to write this to you. You see, a few states in your country of birth have actually decided to look at the possibility of passing bills, which would allow discrimination against homosexuals based on “religious beliefs.”

In recent years, many have started realizing the truth about homosexuality  — that it is actually not a danger to society and that it is not a “lifestyle choice” but simply a way of being. That it is no more “sinful” to be gay than it is to be redheaded.

But there are many religious people out there who are so focused on this issue that they are driving many people away from knowing God — from even experiencing the love of God by telling them they are not welcome and that God’s people do not agree with their “choice.” They are not only driving away homosexuals, but also those who know and care about a homosexual as well as those who recognize this belief is nonsense. Sons, you’re right. That’s almost everyone. And these people are also scratching their heads, wondering why on earth church membership is falling dramatically at a rapid rate.

I know this is hard to believe, especially since we are members of a loving and accepting congregation that welcomes all. It is probably as hard for you to believe as it was for me to believe that my own grandparents (who were Christians) may have actually thought it was okay to have separate bathrooms and water fountains from those of another race, and that somehow, they may have found a way to use the Bible to defend this. Now, I don’t know for certain what they thought. I just know they were alive during that time, so I can only speculate. This is why I’m writing this to you – so you will know what I think.

Mark it down. Today is February 26, 2014, and your mother is a Christian who supports equal rights for the LGBT community and is appalled by the actions of those who claim to serve God. I want no part of it and believe it’s time for Christians like me to stand up and speak up.

You guys are still little right now. I don’t know if you will grow up and realize you are gay. I just know that I love you more than I ever thought I could love – so much that it is painful sometimes. The thought of one day telling you,  “You are not welcome in my home because you’re gay” or even “I don’t agree with your lifestyle choice,” makes me sick to my stomach. It will not happen. Ever. So, rest assured my precious sons. Your mom (and dad!) will welcome you and whomever you love (IF they treat you right!) into our home and our lives. Also, we will be mortified if you are straight and use the Bible to clobber people for who they are.

I do not claim to be a theologian or even a scientist. I am just a mom who has worked with enough youth in her career to know that homosexuality is not a choice. And I don’t need Bible verses or even science to prove what I know in my God-given heart and mind to be true.

Jesus loved all and reached out to those who were considered “unlovable” in his time. I don’t know what makes anyone think he would do any differently were he here among us today.

I almost posted the “status update” below on Facebook this morning (the social media site we have in 2014). However, you will notice I typed it with “Only Me” at the top, because I was afraid to post it. I’m still working on figuring out why I didn’t. Maybe I was afraid of starting an argument. Maybe I was afraid my former, and possibly future colleagues or employers would read it and disagree, and therefore keep me from working when I’m ready to go back to work. I don’t know, but I feel better now after writing to you.

Unlike a number of people, I will never feel ashamed of my stance on this issue, for I know without a doubt that I am on the correct side of history. I just pray that by the time you read this in 2030, you don’t know what I’m talking about because the insanity was short-lived and everyone finally “gets it.”

With lots and lots of unconditional love,



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